100 Days of Greatness: How Trump 2.0 Made America “Great” Again (If You Hate America)

Well, here we are, folks: 100 days into Trump’s second coming, and what a time to be alive — if by “alive,” you mean anesthetized by rage, grief, or disbelief.

The self-proclaimed “savior of America” promised us fireworks. He delivered alright — except the fireworks are metaphorical dumpster fires blazing coast to coast. If you were hoping for unity, prosperity, or, say, basic human dignity — sorry, sucker! You got Trump 2.0: The Revenge.

And to the 39% of Americans still stubbornly nodding along — you special little unicorns — it’s time to stop. Really. You’ve had your fun. The national piñata is broken. It’s time to put down the stick.

Let’s take a tour, shall we?

Democracy: Punched in the Face, Kicked in the Gut

Trump entered office in January with a clear mission: make democracy optional. By February, the “Department of Government Efficiency” (because authoritarianism sounds nicer when you dress it up) had begun its real work: purging “disloyal” civil servants, silencing whistleblowers, and “restructuring” independent agencies to reflect a new slogan: Obedience Above All.

Courts? Pfft. Who needs them when you have Executive Orders written on bar napkins at Mar-a-Lago? Congressional oversight? Cute. Investigations into corruption have been recategorized under “Acts of Treason” — because nothing says “land of the free” like arresting reporters for asking about disappearing COVID aid funds.

The Economy: From Great to ‘Grits for Dinner’

Remember how he campaigned on “the greatest economy ever”? Well, now we have the greatest wealth transfer to billionaires ever.

• Tariffs 2.0 tanked the stock market. Global investors fled the U.S. faster than rats leaving a sinking yacht.
• Middle-class jobs vaporized, replaced by “American Pride Initiatives” — i.e., unpaid internships waving flags.
• Inflation is up again, but don’t worry, Trump said, “If you can’t afford groceries, just buy fewer groceries.” (Real leadership!)

Meanwhile, the budget deficit — that scary thing Republicans pretended to care about under Obama — going up in just three months, thanks to planned new tax cuts for donors and massive military parades to celebrate Trump’s imaginary battles against “deep state zombies.”

Health Care: Survival of the Fittest (and Richest)

Medicare? Slashed.

Medicaid? Obliterated.

The Affordable Care Act? A smoking crater.

Trump’s brilliant solution to the healthcare “problem”? A system called “Patriotic Self-Reliance”: If you can’t afford your insulin, maybe you didn’t love America hard enough. Good luck.

Maternal mortality rates? Up.

Child vaccination rates? Down.

Lifespan projections? Falling like MAGA hats at a windstorm.

But hey, Big Pharma is posting record profits, so at least someone’s living the American Dream!

Environment: Burn, Baby, Burn

Climate change? Not a thing anymore, according to the newly rebranded “Department of Fossil Freedom.”

• Trump greenlit drilling in every national park (“Yellowstone? More like Blackstone, ha!”).
• Pipelines now crisscross sacred indigenous lands like discarded necklaces at a garage sale.
• Environmental regulations? Shredded faster than Trump’s divorce papers.
• And the EPA’s new official slogan? “Pollution is just Freedom you can smell!”

Florida is underwater, California’s burning, but don’t worry — Trump promised he would personally “negotiate with the climate” to “make it stop.” (Sources close to the sun report it’s not answering his calls.)

Women’s Rights: Back to the Stone Age

Did you enjoy basic bodily autonomy, ladies? Adorable. Trump’s 100 days have featured:

• A planned federal ban on abortions after six weeks, with no exceptions for rape or incest — because what’s freedom without forced childbirth?
• A new loyalty oath for women seeking federal benefits: sign a pledge affirming “traditional family values” — or starve.
• An “Advisory Council for American Womanhood,” chaired by (checks notes) Jim Jordan. Because why not let men who can’t find a clitoris legislate your uterus?

Education: Ignorance is Strength

The Department of Education? Going! In its place: the Freedom Learning Institute, a totally-not-indoctrination initiative where history is whatever Trump tweets, evolution is a hoax, and critical thinking is punishable by expulsion.

Meanwhile, public schools, stripped of federal funds, are holding bake sales to afford pencils. Rural districts? Collapsing. But don’t worry — Trump U is back! (And it’s just as scammy as before.)

Foreign Policy: How to Lose Friends and Alienate Allies

Trump 2.0 has been an international humiliation tour:

• He‘s all but exited NATO, because “alliances are for losers.”
• He sent Putin a handwritten Valentine’s Day card, featuring glitter glue and sanctions rollbacks.
• He almost invaded Mexico (“military exercise,” he said), prompting mass refugee crises.
• He tried to buy Greenland again, but this time with Bitcoin.

China, meanwhile, took advantage of the chaos to claim control of Pacific shipping lanes — but it’s fine, because Trump said “nobody uses the Pacific anyway.”

The Soul of America: Auctioned to the Highest Bidder

Maybe the worst damage isn’t even policy. It’s the deeper rot Trump has gleefully fertilized:

• Racism, bigotry, and political violence are now mainstream.
• Disinformation is a civic duty.
• Empathy is weakness, and cruelty is strength.

Trump hasn’t just broken institutions — he’s broken the national spirit, grinding it into cynical dust, then selling it at Trump Tower gift shops ($49.99, plus shipping).

A Plea to the 39%

You, the 39% still squinting through the smoke and saying, “It’s fine! He’s doing great!” — please. Please stop.

This isn’t loyalty anymore.

This isn’t patriotism anymore.

This is self-destruction in a red hat.

You know it. Deep down, you know it.

The cruelty. The corruption. The chaos. This is not who we are supposed to be.

America was never perfect — but we were better than this.

It’s okay to admit it.

It’s okay to let go.

We can do better.

We must do better.

For your children. For your grandchildren.

For all of us.

Julie Bolejack, MBA