By Philip Low (this is not a joke or entertaining message from Julie today) Facebook is trying to stop me from revealing Elon’s master plan, which is why they are not letting me pin the post below and are obstructing the delivery of messages sharing it which Is a
SUBJECT: BREAKING: The World’s First Trump/Putin MEME COIN! Because, Why Not? Dear Esteemed Subscribers (and the NSA Agent Monitoring This), Rejoice! History has been made, and you were lucky enough to be alive to witness it. Not the invention of penicillin, not the moon landing, and certainly not
In an age when common sense is as rare as a $3 bill and bad behavior runs rampant like a possum in a henhouse, it’s refreshing to see someone take a firm stance—preferably with a baseball bat. This week at the Chatterbox bar in Indianapolis, a bartender did
Dear Fellow Americans (and any remaining lovers of irony), Once upon a time, we were a nation that proudly accepted gifts—even ones we didn’t pay for. The Statue of Liberty? Oh no, dear reader, we did not foot the bill for that grand lady in the harbor. She
Ladies, gentlemen, and independent voters with chronic migraines, welcome to another week in these United States, where the news cycle moves faster than a toddler on espresso, and reality resembles a Mark Twain fever dream. Our dear leader—who, through a series of unfortunate events, once again occupies the White
Verse 1: In the land where shadows grow, Truth’s a seed we seldom sow. Voices silenced, freedoms sold, Dreams are bought with tarnished gold. Chorus: Can you hear the people cry? Underneath a darkened sky. Stand together, hand in hand, Reclaim the soul of this great land. Verse 2:
Dear Fellow Americans, Gather ‘round, citizens, and take a bow. For decades, the world gazed upon our great nation with a mixture of admiration, jealousy, and begrudging respect. They watched our movies, ate our cheeseburgers, and dreamed of a life filled with 401(k)s, strip malls, and freedom fries.
Dear Fellow Patriots and Survivors, Well, well, well. Here we are, basking in the warm, comforting glow of America’s Second Coming—or so we’re told. The Trump Administration is back in full swing (assuming it hasn’t been replaced by AI Trump, who will soon assure us that
Dear Fellow Patriots, Get out your calculators and start planning—because thanks to the brilliant minds in Washington, we are about to be RICH! That’s right, the tariffs on foreign goods are set to soar, and according to the ever-reliable White House Press Secretary, Karoline Leavitt, this means we,
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, patriots and billionaires alike—welcome to the grandest, most luxurious, most patriotically profitable transformation in American history! That’s right, our 45th (and maybe 47th, depending on how much democracy we can shake loose) president, Donald J. Trump, has done it again. No longer
Dear Friends, Lovers of Reason, and Survivors of Social Media, It is with great reluctance (and a stiff drink in hand) that I must inform you of a grave threat to our civilization. No, not war, famine, or the unholy union of cargo shorts and dress shoes. I speak of
Dear Fellow Seekers of Sanity, Well, folks, here we are—Trump’s Second Term, otherwise known as Groundhog Day: Constitutional Crisis Edition. While the Democrats in Congress did their level best to demonstrate resistance during the State of the Union—some held up signs, others walked out, a few sat