Screw Calm. Get Angry
Apparently, my new Facebook profile picture — a rainbow fist and the words Screw Calm and Get Angry — offended the delicate sensibilities of a man who decided it was his sacred duty to lecture me on “being civil.
Let’s get something straight: these are not civil times. Civility is the luxury of people who aren’t watching their rights, bodies, and futures being legislated away. Civility is for garden club disputes over whether the azaleas should be pink or white — not for moments when democracy is on fire and the flames are licking at our heels.
And here’s the deeper insult: Women, in particular, have been handed the “be nice” gag order for centuries. Don’t shout. Don’t be too loud. Don’t be too angry. Smile, dear. Be pleasant. Because heaven forbid a woman’s voice carries the raw truth of her rage — it might actually make people uncomfortable.
Well, good. Get uncomfortable. Get very uncomfortable. Because if you’re still clinging to civility while people’s rights are stripped, while hate is emboldened, while the most vulnerable among us are used as pawns in power games, you’re not part of the solution — you’re a human sedative for injustice.
Civility didn’t win women the vote — rage did. Civility didn’t desegregate lunch counters — courage and confrontation did. Civility doesn’t protect the LGBTQ+ community — unrelenting, unyielding, unapologetic activism does.
We are living in dangerous, dangerous times. If you think the right response is to mind our manners while our freedoms are being shoved through the shredder, you are either hopelessly naïve or willfully complicit. Civility is the polished smile on the face of oppression — the “please” and “thank you” whispered as the door locks behind you.
So no, I won’t be “civil.” I will be loud. I will be angry. I will be relentless. I will speak up for women, for LGBTQ+ rights, for racial justice, for bodily autonomy, and for the preservation of democracy. If that makes you uncomfortable, then congratulations — you’ve finally felt the faintest fraction of what it’s like to be on the receiving end of systemic injustice.
Screw calm. Get angry. Because they’re counting on your silence.
Julie Bolejack, MBA
